Photo Courtesy of: Walking on Scorpions

Does it seem like you are always marching uphill? It is snowing [again] in Montreal. It started snowing last night and me thinks it has been snowing all day as well, not that I was paying attention to it, because I was sleeping. Oh the joy of being on academic holiday!!

It is a balmy [-8c with a wind chill of -17c] outside as the snow is being whipped up between the buildings in my neighborhood. Our balcony is covered in snow all the way back to the bedroom door.

I got an invitation from Ron at the [Int'l Carnival of Pozitivities] today to contribute to his project, which was very nice.  I had read all of the latest entries over the last few weeks, although I did not submit anything, it was nice to be asked. For anyone who is HIV positive coming to read – there is a multitude of posts over there in [Pages] for you to read. My collection of stories and assorted other gems are wonderful reads.

There are five shopping days left until Christmas, for those who have not yet finished their shopping. Hubby has been busy running all over town to finish his shopping, I had mine done over a week ago. No mall runnings for me.

Yesterday I gifted my favorite women at my home group, with their yearly traditional gift from the Willow Collection. They were very touched by the gesture. I had to say thank you for the ways that they have supported me in my sobriety, they baked me a cake for my birthday and brought me gifts just because and they also bought me my anniversary medallions. So a little thanks goes a long way.

Hubby will be leaving for the capitol on Friday providing the weather does not hamper bus traffic between the provinces. I will look forward to having that time to myself. It is very rare that I have two days to myself, so I take full advantage of that time. We got word from the government today that our January financial aide would be coming on the 27th of December which is very kewl – we can take some of that cash and pay off tuition bills and other assorted sundry bills that we have been trying to pay off for months. We always get what we need, when we live in the 24 hours day model.

Yesterday was kind of rough, I have to say. I came home from my meeting and I was visibly upset, I was moody and somewhat angry. I put up that Tall Ship post then I left a comment over on Steve’s blog, I wasn’t angry at you bud, I guess I am angry at disease and suffering. I am angry that the world operates on the [take a pill to make it better] method, I know about pills because I take enough of them to choke a horse daily. I WISH that the medical establishment could find cures for many of our medical situations thereby stemming the need to prescribe pills, give me a cure any day over a bottle of medication.

My contention with all these pills is this: There are too many pills on the market. And those who take pills for the sheer necessity of stemming a problem, without the forward action behind the pill taking, those pills will eventually fail you. We take a pill for what ever ails us, and many expect that to happen, and they do not put the same emotional energy to healing themselves, and yet they expect that magic pill to make the boogey men go away!! It takes a lot of work for me emotionally to generate the same force of power behind the medical power that my meds do as well. If one does not meet the pill energy with the same mental and emotional energy, the pills will eventually fail you.

I know full well that many of us take pills for problems that demand that we med up because if we do not, we will surely die or go insane. So I understand that sometimes pills are necessary to combat sickness, addiction, illness or disease. I believe I have mastered my disease therefore I dose as I believe is necessary – I don’t take one more pill than is necessary, even if it means countering a dosing mandate from my medical team. All they see is numbers and the forget that I know my body better than anyone else, and I have other powers at my disposal who have guided me in my quest for life.

***********

There that is much better, some tunes to go with the writing, a little Matt White…

So now we are going to have some fun
Here is a MeMe from [Cooper's Corridor]

Were you named after somebody?

Yes I was at one time, a soldier that my father had a relationship during the Viet Nam War, when I turned 30 I changed my name to suit my quest for survival. I could not live up to the formers valor and sacrifice.

When was the last time you cried?

I weep at the slightest provocation. I wept last night listening to one of my closest friends sob about her suffering, knowing I was powerless to make it stop.

Do you like your handwriting?

Yeah, it’s ok. I type much better…

What is your favourite lunch meat?

Smoked ham or turkey on baguette with sharp cheddar and a pickle.

Do you have kids?
I have two boys that I have been foster parent to for many years.

If you were another person, would you be friends with you?
Yes. Absolutely!

Do you still have your tonsils?
No, they were removed when I was a little boy.

Would you bungee jump?
I don’t know. I have a sensible fear of heights

What is your favourite cereal?
Rice Krispies

Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Yes, I love my shoes, I have at least one pair of shoes for every day of the week

Do you think you are strong?
I may not be superman, but I have the inner strength of a superhero, when it is necessary to apply that strength.

What is your favourite ice cream?
Breyer’s Strawberry Ice Cream

What is the first thing you notice about people?
The way they hold themselves, I look for their neon sign and their ability to look me in the eye when we speak.

Red or pink?
Red, blood red

What is the least favourite physical thing about yourself?
I have protease paunch from my medication which has mis-shapen my body facially and across my midsection.

Who do you miss the most?
My grandmothers, they were the women who helped me become the man I am.

What colour pants and shoes are you wearing?
I am wearing my SOBE cozies that I bought years ago when I was still living in Miami, sox and a t-shirt.

What was the last thing you ate?
Beef and Vegetable soup at 5 a.m. this morning before bed

What are you listening to right now?
I am listening to Matt White on my pod.

Favourite smells?
Freshly baked bread, falling snow, a crisp fall day on the mountain, my hubby has a particular scent that I quite like when he sleeps.

Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?
That would be my friend Karl. The other night.

Favourite sport to watch?
I love Ice Skating and Winter sports, and of course Collegiate wrestling.

Hair colour?
Light walnut Loreal color, ok so I am a vain old man, no gray hair on my head…

Eye colour?
Blue

Favourite Food?
Fresh baguette, a great steak, endless pasta

What colour shirt are you wearing?
A bergundy t-shirt

Winter or summer?
I love the Winter, the falling snow, the pristine landscape and untrod ground up on the mountain. It is too hot in the summer here.

Favourite dessert?
Anything chocolatey.

Hugs or kisses?
Hugs are nice, kissing is much nicer

What book are you reading now?
I just finished reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows this morning, I usually have more than one book working, Many Lives Many Masters and the Journey Home…

What is on your mouse pad?
Nothing, it is a plain black mouse pad.

What did you watch on TV last night?
I got home from my meeting and did some writing. Tuesday is always Boston Legal, I just love that show.

Favourite Sound?
Birdsong first thing in the morning, the whisper of Gods voice in the falling snow

Do you have a special talent?
I do.

Where were you born?
New Britain, Ct. many years ago. I haven’t been back there in over 25 years